Too much EXPOSURE

Promoting yourself and your business on social media inevitably opens you up to criticism. Hellen Ward discusses how to handle the trolls

Like any 50-something who grew up in the 1970s, I loved Abba as a little girl (I still love a bit of Dancing Queen) so it was very interesting to watch the group interviewed on TV at the launch of their digital show, Voyage.

Bjorn Ulvaeus was asked a question by a journalist who was lauding the iconic group and concept. Querying which music magazine the questioner worked for, Bjorn was quick to react when he found out, saying he remembered that the magazine in question slated Abba during the ’70s, leaving a perplexed journalist to splutter an apology. Revenge is a dish best served very cold, right?

What struck me was that this retaliation came from one of the most successful musicians of all time (even Johnny Rotten from the Sex Pistols is quoted as saying that Abba wrote the most perfect pop songs ever). Bjorn instantly remembered this one comment that really hurt from over 40 years ago.

It’s often said that actors and directors only remember their worst review, and this proved to be a case in point. Having sold millions of records and been celebrated as a mega-successful songwriter, producer and performer, Bjorn still remembered the magazine, which clearly thought his band were uncool and culturally irrelevant and published an article to that effect.

Social media likes to paint this characteristic as a modern phenomenon. After all, look how many reality TV stars suffer from appalling mental health issues, sometimes resulting in devasting consequences after exposing themselves to widespread critique on platforms such as Instagram and Twitter.

Open forum

I’ve actually closed my Twitter account for that very reason. In my very small way, I’ve been trolled after appearing on TV and it’s not pleasant, because whether it makes sense or not, nobody can deny that one stinging review or comment can stay with you and play over again in your mind, however positive you keep your mindset. The trouble with putting yourself out there and looking for public acceptance or, dare I say it, adoration, is that it is very often coupled with criticism; justified or not. It’s human nature to want to be liked, so it stings when someone has it in for you even though we know that it’s just not possible that everybody will like us.

It’s very interesting that even those who have huge social media followings will often focus so much on the negative and almost seem oblivious to all the positive, warm and reassuring comments.

It’s listening to those negative inner voices that stirs up our childhood need for acceptance and approval, which can be so raw, however old we are. As such, you very often see people, even from our sector, posting content that only addresses the minor criticism they have received, instead of focusing on the supportive, positive comments.

"THE TROUBLE with SOCIAL MEDIA is that you OPEN YOURSELF up to JUDGEMENT FROM EVERYONE - about you, your team, your salon, YOUR SERVICES"

Trolling is bullying – end of. The trouble with living in a world of social media is that you open yourself up to judgement from everyone – about you, your team, your salon, your services… with no filter on whether the person making the remarks is justified or qualified to comment. Worse still, those comments and reviews are there forever – the internet is indelible.

Unfair abuse

I’m sure I’m not alone in saying that we’ve been subject to some terrible reviews online, accusing us of all manner of things from harassment to incompetence – all grossly unfair, untrue and unfounded. There’s little right of reply. We’ve banned clients who I’d politely ejected from the premises for posting horrendous slurs and accusations against our business.

Although legislation governing social media is set to get much stricter, with the eternal nature of the internet, once its out there it’s out there.

So, what’s the answer? Do we just have to toughen up? Well, I have two Instagram accounts; one private (for friends and family) and one public (for work), and that helps. But when it comes to the salon, safeguarding the reputation of the brand and the staff that work there is infinitely more challenging.

Of course, if we were to post about unreasonable clients, people who’ve tried to defraud and steal from us, phoney insurance claims for suspect “damage and injury”, and serial complainers who have no intention of ever being a real customer, we’d no doubt be sued.

People twist things. People say things that aren’t true. The trouble with the internet and the modern world is that there is no judge or jury. The only thing to do is to try to focus on the positive and show the negative as the minority that it truly is.

Even so, I’m sure Bjorn Ulvaeus felt sorely tempted to remind that journalist that one of the coolest people from the ’70s has a complete Abba back catalogue that he treasures in his personal record collection, so there!

Hellen Ward is managing director of Richard Ward Hair & Metrospa in London and a beauty ambassador for the National Hair & Beauty Federation (NHBF).